Alright. Time for a brief rant. Out of all the problems facing our country, both domestic and international, and the incredibly limited amount of time that our government allows itself to find solutions, WHY IS EVERYONE WORRIED ABOUT WHAT IS HAPPENING WITH BASEBALL! WHO FUCKING CARES?!?!?!!

It was bad enough when the congress took DAYS to talk about baseball, and steroids, and what meat head put what style of elephant testosterone in their blood stream so that they wouldn’t have to quit the game and start selling used cars while fading into obscurity. That alone was absurd, but then today I read this:

FBI opens inquiry into Clemens’ testimony

The FBI is investigating whether baseball great Roger Clemens perjured himself in testimony before the House Oversight and Government Reform Committee earlier this month, government officials told CNN on Thursday.

The FBI will also probe whether his former personal trainer, Brian McNamee, lied in testimony to the same committee, the officials said.

??!?!?!?!??!!?

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?!?!

Ok, alright, whew. So, then look at this, from the Guardian,

FBI swamped by terror tapes

More than 120,000 hours of wiretapped conversations between terrorist suspects and sympathisers since the September 11 attacks have not been translated because of the FBI’s lack of linguists, according to an official report.

The report, by the justice department’s inspector-general, also found that many sensitive intercepts have been wiped automatically from the memory of the FBI’s outdated computers to save hard-drive storage space.

Does that sound right to you? The FBI has plenty of time to work up a full investigation about Roger Clemens and some asshole trainer, but can’t scratch up the wherewithal to FIGURE OUT WHAT THE TERRORISTS ARE TALKING ABOUT?!?!

So, a poll:

I’ll be curious to see what you think. Meanwhile, ready yourself for the hard hitting “How do the Peanuts Kids Know What Snoopy Is Talking About?” congressional investigations that are sure to come.

This is something a friend turned me on to. These are reworked Garfield comic strips that feature only John Arbuckle. Super funny. Check them out. More proof that the internet is filled with super creative people, who when equipped with the means to see their various ideas out, can do really cool things. Awesome. They rule.

Here it is.

The new episode of Fat Robot Radio is up today. Go listen, enjoy, and prosper.

Bush’s approval rating has dropped to a fun new low of 19%. From the American research group:

George W. Bush’s overall job approval rating has dropped to a new low in American Research Group polling as 78% of Americans say that the national economy is getting worse according to the latest survey from the American Research Group.

Among all Americans, 19% approve of the way Bush is handling his job as president and 77% disapprove. When it comes to Bush’s handling of the economy, 14% approve and 79% disapprove.

I think, with a little application and hard work, he can get that number down to 10%. And by the way, who are these 19% who think things are going well? What does it take to shake their loyalty? Scary thought.

The only actual piece of news you are likely to run into today, developed overnight in Cuba. Fidel Castro, LOOOOOOOOOONG time dictator of Cuba, is resigning, due to the fact that his body is nearly dead. It is apparently difficult to lift something as heavy as an iron fist if you don’t have any arm muscles. Go figure.

Castro has been this sort of embarrassing cartoon character that has made the United States look stupid since the Eisenhower administration. A little communist barnacle that clung to the side of our national hull through decades of hostility, their own internal poverty and domestic instability, and our countless attempts to kill Castro and end his government. AND LOOK HOW WELL WE DID! It took only the cold specter of death to force Castro from power, and I’m sure he’ll spend his remaining days, the ones he is lucid for, feeling really bad about himself and coming to the realization that America has been right all along. Our repeated assassination attempts and a multi decade embargo really cramped his style. WE SHOWED HIM! He sure looks stupid now, having been in power longer than any sitting dictator I can think of of the top of my head, and having seen no less than 10 Presidents take shots at him. He even outlasted the Soviet Union.

So now Castro leaves the international stage, after having stayed far past his curtain call already, to go deteriorate in some fabulous military compound or palatial estate, cared for by the best physicians endless years of tyranny can supply. What will happen to Cuba? Who knows. Looks like Castro’s little brother, Raul, may be taking over. Raul is a scrappy young pup, a mere 77 years old, (only five years older than John McCain by the way) and will surely invigorate the Cuban people with his youth and vigor. Will democracy come to Cuba now that Castro is soon to be rat meat? I hope so. It would be nice to get good Cuban cigars again, and give booze filled American college students another place to throw up during spring break. Oh, plus the Cuban people could finally see a little freedom, by which I mean American Idol, and could finally join up with the rest of us here in the 21st century. NOW ONLY HALF THE REST OF THE PLANET TO GO!

So we say goodbye to our friend Fidel, the trusty old Hatfield to our irate McCoy, and we sincerely hope that he spends his remaining days crapping into a bag and trying to remember which day of the week it is. His is after all, a dictator, and that is lame. His people can only be better off now that he is gone, unless whoever takes power next turns out to be an even worse, even more entrenched and bitter dictator. We’ll see soon I guess.

Check out these pictures, from Harpers Bazaar.

Those photographs are of Francis Bean Cobain, daughter of Courtney Love and Kurt Cobain. Aside from the logical speculations about how screwed up any person left in the care of Courtney Love for an extended period of time is likely to be, I find it amazing that the young Cobain is 16 years old. Lets hope there is some scrap of Nirvana cash left for her by the time she turns 18.

Three very Geek-Centric movies will be busting all manner of blocks this summer, and I thought I would throw up the trailers for each one, so that you could get a look at them.

First off, I present Jon Favreau’s adaptation of Marvel Comics classic Iron Man. I’m not the biggest Marvel fan ever, but the man who brought Earth films such as Swingers and Elf, looks ready to knock this out of the park.

Next up, the new installment of the Spielberg/Lucas Indiana Jones love child, Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. I’m still not convinced that this is a good idea, but this trailer doesn’t look too bad.

Lastly, the Big Dog, Number One With A Bullet, Toppermost of the Poppermost, The Dark Knight. This TRAILER is kick ass enough to validate the project, and I absolutely cannot wait until it comes out. Batman Begins was good, and this might be better.

So yeah. Good time to be a Geek. (And a Democrat, incidentally. I know. I almost made it the whole article.)

I’ve been avoiding the temptation to talk about the Primaries. I’m not usually superstitious, but after New Hampshire, and considering who’s involved, I don’t want to jinx anything. I’ve already said too much.

Instead, I want to point out something important, and an explanation of why it’s important. I didn’t write this, so it’s not a Jinx. It came from TPM’s election coverage. No Whammies.

Civil Rights Icon John Lewis Switches Super-Delegate Vote From Hillary To Obama
By Eric Kleefeld - February 14, 2008, 10:26PM

This is big news, and may well be the beginning of the end for Hillary Clinton’s super-delegate strategy. The New York Times reports that Rep. John Lewis (D-GA), a legend of the civil rights movement who had endorsed Hillary last year, is switching his super-delegate vote from Hillary over to Barack Obama.

Lewis stopped short of formally switching his endorsement over to Obama, but said he would make a decision on that matter within a few days. Lewis also said that he and other lawmakers would meet soon to decide just how they should involve themselves in the nomination fight — and he cited the super-delegate battle as a pitfall that could weaken the party’s hopes this Fall.

In short, it looks like the Hillary campaign probably can’t count on the super-delegates to save them, should they lose out in the elected delegate race. So if it becomes clear that Obama ends up with an insurmountable lead — or Hillary, for that matter — there could be a strong message from super-delegates that the loser has to concede defeat and close up shop.

Looks like the Party Leaders are tougher than I thought. Or they’re just as powerful as they ever were and someone else got weaker. I’m not saying who.

The Writers Strike is finally over. Let all programming, excellent and substandard, be free. Many networks are using this as an opportunity to trim the fat, (That means you “Bionic Woman”). Before long, everything will be back to normal, by which I mean predominantly crappy.

Looks like the WGA got a pretty fair deal, but I don’t know much about these things, so maybe it’s merely a more gentle screwing. Either way, the days of free donuts from celebrities with good publicists is over.

Go to Variety for actual coverage.

One year ago today, America lost on of it’s greatest visionaries. That’s right, Anna Nicole Smith was taken from us on this date, last year. It has been a LONG, LONG, LONG year, and the world was emptier without Anna Nicole Smith in it. It has surely had more drugs around though. If you want to know more about the anniversary, and I have no idea why you would, you can always rely on TMZ. Enjoy.