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Thursday, August 31, 2006

TRAIN WRECK

Come on Mike…

Tyson Reduced to Vegas Strip Freak Show



Wednesday, August 30, 2006

WORDS HAVE MEANING

Here is a really good article, written by an actual journalist, that gets into a little bit of what I was talking about yesterday.

The new GOP buzzword: Fascism

Here are a few bits that I like from the article:

While “fascism” once referred to the rigid nationalistic one-party dictatorship first instituted in Italy, it has “been used very loosely in all kinds of ways for a long time,” said Wayne Fields, a specialist in presidential rhetoric at Washington University in St. Louis.

“Typically, the Bush administration finds its vocabulary someplace in the middle ground of popular culture. It seems to me that they’re trying to find something that resonates, without any effort to really define what they mean,” Fields said.

So Fascism is a “rigid nationalistic one-party dictatorship” huh? Does it strike anyone as ironic that a party that controls the Presidency and both houses of congress is trying to use fear of fascism to suppress political dissent and inspire nationalism? Maybe that’s just me.



GINNING UP THE FEAR VOTE WITH DONALD RUMSFELD

So, what do you do if you’re the GOP heading into a midterm election cycle with corruption scandals hovering over your head, a deteriorating war on your hands, and an inconveniently timed Hurricane Katrina anniversary to look out for?

Easy.

You trot out the Hitler references. From the Washington Post:

Speaking to several thousand veterans at the American Legion’s national convention, Rumsfeld recited what he called the lessons of history, including the failure to confront Hitler in the 1930s. He quoted Winston Churchill as observing that trying to accommodate Hitler was “a bit like feeding a crocodile, hoping it would eat you last.” “I recount this history because once again we face similar challenges in efforts to confront the rising threat of a new type of fascism,” he said.

I assume this implies that the Bush Administration has a firm grasp on the lessons of History. I guess they slept through the lesson on Vietnam.

This is a wonderful game they play. Aside from displaying his gross misunderstanding of Fascism, Rumsfeld is primarily trying to compare the legitimate concern by people in this country over the Bush Administration’s mishandling of the War on Terror and the War in Iraq with the European appeasement of Hitler in the 1930’s, ignoring the fact that no one, anywhere, has suggested appeasing anybody. They are making it sound like liberals would love nothing more than to find Osama Bin Laden and give him a nice long back rub. I can only assume that by appeasement he is referring to their imagined idea that all liberals are anxious to pull out of Iraq immediately. True, some Liberals feel this way. Some would like to see an increased UN role in the conflict. Some would like us to stay the course but totally change our strategy. Some would like to see Iraq divided into a loose confederation comprising three separate Shite, Sunni, and Kurdish states. Some would like to see a measured pull out over a long period of time. People have all kinds of ideas. The only thing all of us can agree on is that we need to have some kind of rational debate about the issue, which in the age of Bush apparently equals the wholesale appeasement of evil. This is more of the same, “dissent=treason” crap they’ve been trying to sell since it became politically viable to try to do so in the wake of 9-11.

The only difference is that now it’s the only trick they have left. Nobody falls for anything else anymore.

Here is a news flash, which might come as a shock to some Republicans:

THIS IS NOT WORLD WAR II

Sorry. But its true. Our grapple with Islamic Terrorism is not analogous to the rise of Fascism and Nazism during the Second World War. Rumsfeld has compared both al Zarqawi and Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez to Hitler. He LOVES this Hitler thing. Name dropping WWII and Hitler gets a reaction out of people, one Republicans desperately need to capitalise on as more and more people stop buying their bullshit. I think the constant comparisons of one trivial political leader after another to Adolf Hitler minimises the horrors of World War II, but that’s just my opinion.

The threats posed by networked global terrorism are very real, and very serious, and need to be considered as the major challenge facing our nation at this point in the 21st century. EVERYONE agrees on that, despite what Bush and Rumsfeld and the rest of the peanut gallery would have you believe. Even if you want to accept the dubious comparison that these Anti-American actors are “The New Nazis”, does that necessarily imply that Bush and his lap dogs should be trusted to manage this threat? I don’t think they’ve established any aptitude for fighting wars or stopping the spread of terrorism. All evidence points to the contrary. Afghanistan is treading water, Iraq could collapse into Civil war at any moment, as they themselves will be quick to tell you, terrorists are still able to attack inside the United states at any moment. It appears that the only thing they are good at is TALKING about terrorism. The only people they are EFFECTIVE in fighting are Democrats. I think its time we were allowed to have a substantive debate in this country without having to worry about being called Nazi sympathisers by Republicans. They should be ashamed of themselves. ESPECIALLY Donald Rumsfeld, whose gross and complete incompetence has left Iraq in the mess its in right now. I say its time to cut the rhetoric and get down to solving some of these problems, and if they aren’t willing to do it, then I know a few people who are.



Monday, August 28, 2006

MR. PICASSOHEAD

Bored? Then check this out. It’ll get you through a lunch break.

Mr. Picassohead



Friday, August 25, 2006

Testing

In order to make Brain Pan a better site we will be forced to participate in all manner of bizarre testing over the weekend. You may see all kinds of strange things, but rest assured, things will be back to normal soon. Thanks for your patience.



Thursday, August 24, 2006

THE 30-SECOND BUNNIES THEATRE LIBRARY

This site is awesome. These people, who have some association with the Stars Television Network, have made a series of great cartoons, “in which a troupe of bunnies parodies a collection of movies by re-enacting them in 30 seconds, more or less.” The clips are very funny, and in some cases, reveal how little is really going on in the film in question. Find them here:

~ The 30-Second Bunnies Theatre Library ~



Wednesday, August 23, 2006

REPUBLICAN RHETORIC RETORT OF THE DAY

#1792 - “France”

Asshole Republican Says: “Fuck France. If it wasn’t for us they’d be speaking GERMAN today. (Insert Laughs and Guffaws from pin headed Freedom Fry eaters).”

Reasonable Retort: “Sure, and if it wasn’t for France, we’d be British still. (Insert Asshole Republicans scratching heads and trying to figure out why we’d still be British. Continue.) You know, because of the fact that French support for the Americans during a crucial period of the Revolutionary war kept a floundering, ill equipped, and cash starved rebellion from completely imploding. I say we call it square. (Flee. The dimwitted can become violent when confused.)

Next Time: #0258 - “Criticism is Treason”



SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE CAST TO BE TRIMMED

The NY post has a story alleging that the cast of Saturday Night Live is about to be cut from its current 16 to a lean 10 members. Tina Fey and Rachel Dratch are gone to do the TV show, Studio 60 On The Sunset Strip, which means that four more are, if you believe the NY Post, up for the axe. Plus, and I don’t think this can be over stressed, SNL is likely to have WAY more attention this year than it normally does due to the debut of “Studio 60“, and the Lorne Michael’s produced “30 Rock“. Both shows are about the fictional backstage antics of SNL-type programs, and if either one of them are successful, this could prove to be a high profile year for the ten who make the cut. Ani’t It Cool News says this:

The Post story seems to suggest that Seth Myers, Amy Poehler, Daryl Hammond and Andy Samberg will stick around. That means the four evictees will come out of this pool of 10:

Fred Armisen
Will Forte
Bill Hader
Finesse Mitchell
Chris Parnell
Maya Rudolph
Horatio Sanz
Jason Sudeikis
Kenan Thompson
Kristin Wiig

So fine. Cut your four. I pick Kristin Wig, who I despise. Otherwise I don’t care. Maybe Kristin Wiig four times.



Tuesday, August 22, 2006

SNAKES IN YOUR PHONE

I saw Snakes On A Plane today, and I highly recommend it. I have watched a lot of movies this summer, and this one delivers on its promises better than any other, save Little Miss Sunshine, which was also very good.

I know, everybody’s sick of hearing about this movie, so much so that I fear it may have affected the film’s box office, but in honor of my status as the “Last Person On Earth To Jump On ‘The Snakes On Plane’ Bandwagon,” I would like to present a cool feature available on the movie’s website. You can, if you plug in a few little bits of information, send or receive a recorded phone message from Samuel L. Jackson. It’s pretty cool. Find it here.



Saturday, August 19, 2006

KEVIN SMITH: AT THE MOVIES

While Roger Ebert is unable to work due to a grapple with thyroid cancer, he has had a variety of people fill in for him on his TV show, Ebert & Roper. A couple of weeks ago Kevin Smith did the honors, and has been thoughtful enough to post links to the shows segments on YouTube. Here is what it says on News Askew:

“YouTube’s got a new 10 minute limit on clippage, sadly, so we have to bring this one to you in four chunks — Here’s the complete “At the Movies” appearance from this past weekend with Richard Roeper and our very own Kevin Smith. Watch Kevin take the reins of the program very deftly as he gives his honest opinion of the latest crop of flicks hitting theaters near you. Here’s hoping that he might be invited back after this wonderful showing. Enjoy it via our News Askew YouTube channel!”

Here they are:

Part One
Part Two
Part Three
Part Four



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