The US Senate voted today to make English the official language. Sen. Lindsey Graham had this to say:

“We are trying to make an assimilation statement.”

Democratic Sen. Harry Reid was incensed by the move:

“I really believe this amendment is racist. I think it is directed basically to people who speak Spanish.”

The debate turned heated when Graham reveled himself to be, not the distinguished Republican senator from South Carolina, but Six of Nine, one of the soulless cyborgs from the Borg collective.

Six of Nine then blasted Reid in the chest with a phaser bolt from his cybernetic arm, exclaming, “Resistance is futile — you will be assimilated,” before injecting him with a synthetic paralytic agent and beaming him back to the Borg Cube, presumably to fitted for Borg implants.

Six of Nine/Sen. Lindsy Graham on the floor of the Senate

Today's vote puts the establishment of a national language one step closer. The Senate’s decision mandates that no one has “a right, entitlement or claim to have the government of the US or any of its officials or representatives act, communicate, perform or provide services or provide materials in any language other than English”.